1. |
Look At This Mess
01:29
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Look at this mess that I have made, my pedal lays flat,
my wheels are a blade, no mirrors point back, my eyes are a shade,
my dashboard, it lacks a metric for shame you say “please lift your eyes
And see what you do, your family’s worried and rooting for you
But goddamnit dude, you have to slow down
Your fever is pitched, your thorns aren’t a crown
You’ll skid towards a ditch and your words won’t make sense
And you’ll try to say:
“Look at this mess that I have made, I’ve written a book that I have betrayed
I have become something of pain
Furl up my face, untie my name””
You say “please lift your eyes, and see what you’ve got, your friends
They still see you and haven’t forgot
But goddamnit dude, the work’s still ahead
Observe the wreckage and trace back the tread
Sure, we’re happy that you are not dead
But you can’t stay the same
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2. |
Heaven Is Far
03:14
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There are some things you can do
You can’t undo
I thought it right to explore each door
but others always close on you
Spray paint stain on your brainstem
Bubbles in your spine
Clocks start living in mirrors
The urgent steps of time
Secret codes in common words
That melt you to your feet
I thought I found a clean way down
But I was incomplete
Now I feel irradiated, ceiling ‘bove my head
The other folks that know this pain well
A bit bent up, but they ain’t dead
I think I know a fraction of a fraction of what you mean
I can’t compare my secret blood
To your timeless suffering
Each choice was in a haze
Each crucial moment went too fast
If that door would only open
I’d redo the past
I’ll hold you if you let me
I’ll leave you if you ask
I never wanted suffering
But that time’s already passed
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3. |
Tell Me The Truth
01:49
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Words fail me, so I fail you
The lost brother can’t see through his eyelids and
I give and I give more (ooh-ohohh)
Why bother if I can’t show you me
Or implant a feeling
The ceiling holds us all in (ooh-ohohh)
There’s nothing I can do
I’ve gotta get it through my skull;
Is anyone alive? Is anyone alive?
So I will do my best,
Make amends
Pass the tests
And hope that the words can be
Heard as true (ooh-ohohh)
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4. |
Push Down The Fear
03:36
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Lately I’ve been showing every flaw
I don’t think that I can comfort you at all
You’ve always been my sweetest friend
What the hell have I done just tryin to pretend
Your face doesn’t flash up on my screen
I used to be clean but all this shit reminds of everything
Push down the fear
I think I’m running out of luck my dear
It’s much too late to just disappear
I’m here and that’s just not gonna change
Lately my language has been full of tropes
Things get so much simpler when you’ve bungled all your hopes
No I’m not done, I have more love to give
Fighting singing writing dreamin’ as long as I live
I’m happy to be given so much time
Don’t throw it away, I’m buildin something mine and only mine
Push down the fear
I think I’m runnin out of luck my dear
It’s much too late to just disappear
I’m here and that’s just not gonna change
No way I’ll go, though I can to travel to Nepal or Mexico
Our memories run parallel, in stereo
I’ll grow and that’s just not gonna change
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5. |
O' Poison Stone
05:22
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Between my eyes above my nose
Beneath my skull there is a stone
Colonizing with a spell
The men you love know it well
It wants to conquer and be loveless and free
But I love you and I want to get it out of me
My mothers and sisters chip away
Everyone catches my mistakes
Be the change, become a man
Kill the devil in your hands
Right now we’re building history with our teeth
There is no question, we must proceed carefully
Lest we echo the pain of yesterday
I love you all and I don’t wanna fall so I’ll listen when you say
“We want you to be better,
We need you to be wise
We all got something deep inside that makes us shitty guys
So put aside your macho pride
And think of femmes you know
Imagine they are fighting battles
Wounds that never show
So put aside your selfishness
Be more self aware
Everyone was once a baby
We just need repair”
So isolate the ancient stone
Purge it from your head
There is no room in our new world
For a pain that should be dead
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6. |
Mother and Child
02:46
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Mother and child, there’s a love that painful
Mother and child, there’s a debt you’re payin’ for
Her eyes drift to the floor
You wonder if you coulda said more
Mother and child, love and death and rainfall
Vulnerable love, you never make it easy
Vulnerable love, you’re threatenin’ when you please me
You bring your heart into the light
You purchase another side,
Looks like a hole so mean that makes you sink so deeply
Is it worth it? There’s no way to make it out
But if someone has to go, I hope that it ain’t slow
But I know if it’s me, I’m sorry
If it ain’t, then I forgive you for letting this love do what it’s to do
Mother and child, we all need forgiveness
Mother and child, no one should outlive this
For when the lonely do
The happy days are few
Mother and child, time and space and sickness
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7. |
Frisbee/Failure
01:37
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8. |
Adam
08:10
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Each loving person has a clock
That they can turn back or make it stop
Be swept away by just a thought
Sometimes you’re just taking stock
My sister and I used to stay up late
On the mountain by the lake
Beneath a sea of plastic stars
Stuck to the ceiling, glow in the dark
Constellation stories
We’d conjure for these
Arbitrary decorations
Which always told me
You can always be free
When things don’t make sense
We’re projecting plots
And connecting dots in self defense
One night Katherine came out
We all dropped acid and we drove south
By the river to die in vain
Hoping to be reborn sane
But really we just had fun for like a day
I had lost her along the way
That night I found her, I thought to say
“I’m sorry, I thought we were gonna stick together”
And she responded, “That’s okay, it started off as a beautiful thought”
And then I couldn’t see her face
The pain I wrought
Was never from a thought
Just some empty space
We all know adam left a map
Footsteps shuffling there and back
She said, “He became his songs”
Theories of why and where he’s gone
I said, “You know, he’s still around,
His voice remains above the ground”
That was no weight off anyone
His voice, his choice his moon and sun
They still drag us down
An ancient sound
No more invented information
It doesn’t lift the curse,
In fact, it makes it worse
Because he’s just beyond our reach
What you leave behind will get stuck in time
And will never be enough
Will this song survive when I’m not alive
If it does, I’m sorry
May my echo always scream of love!
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9. |
Please Stay Alive
02:48
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I ain’t givin up on my family
And I’ma keep on living with you here with me
I ain’t gonna quit not quitin’ things
And I think I got sixty years left in this thing
Though I’m not old
I’m not gold
I’m workin on it baby, only time will heal my soul
I won’t go
Hell no!
Nothin’s ever over cause we have tomorrow
I love bein’ here
Oh please tell momma not to worry,
I won’t disappear
I can wait days or months or years
However long it takes for the smoke to finally clear
No matter what you’re someone’s baby
If you disagree, consider maybe there’s someone on this planet
patiently waiting for you
So I’ma make sure push through
So if you’re rolling your eyes, I understand
Once a year a song this corny passes through my pen
But I cannot wait for this to happen again
Without making it exactly clear exactly where I stand
Right I’m alive and so are you
And I ain’t got no earthly conception of the shit that you go through
And if you wanna know the best thing that you can do
Is just know that things will sometimes/always come out of the blue
It’s true, the blue is always here with you
I hate being here
Shit gets hard and things get dark
There’s voices I can hear
I can run through my fears
Cracking little jokes and anecdotes so I won’t disappear
I’m runnin so this death can’t take me
Feel my love and feel my safety
Let's keep things on this side of that lonely dimensional split
I’ma make sure you don’t quit
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10. |
Sure, You Are Loved
05:14
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